I'm not even sure what day this would be for my diet. So much has happened since I posted last - 8 months ago. Besides finishing up for Danielle and Ross's wedding, we also acquired a sweet little foster baby straight from the hospital on July 15th. That set our world upside down for awhile getting used to having a baby in the house again. It's all been worth it and wonderful. Now 7 months later we are getting ready to adopt her and she will be legally ours in less than a month.
What a roller coaster ride that has been for my eating choices. It's hard to realize that I needed to admit that I can be an emotional eater and I finally admitted that I have an addiction to food. I couldn't admit that when I started my lifestyle change, it took me a year to get there. The thought that I don't have control over something was devastatingly awful to me. But now I'm there, admitting that I have this struggle and will have this struggle the rest of my life. The problem with it is it's not like I can live without food like an alcoholic can live without alcohol or a drug addict can live without their drug of choice. I have to eat to live, so I have to make purposeful choices to eat the right foods all the time. Something that I've been struggling to do since July.
I'm finally almost to having lost 100 lbs. and I keep swinging back and forth between the lowest weight I've been and 5 lbs more than that. Tiffany from metabolic the other night said, you are teasing yourself, you are self sabotaging. When you finally decide you want it bad enough, you'll do it. My problem doesn't tend to be Monday - Thursday it's Friday - Sunday. I don't know why I can't make the good healthy choices on the weekends. It's not that hard and the foods I eat I like. I know I can do it, I just need to do it. So here I go starting again tomorrow to see if I can make the proper choices and eat the way I need to all week long. I even asked Jerry and the kids to stop buying the stuff I would call crap food and having it in the house. They struggle with not being able to have it just because mom/wife can't have it, or chooses not to want to eat it, but that truly is the help I need. Lately though it's not about the food in the house, it's about the choices I make eating out. I've also been battling some health issues lately which have made it hard to eat on plan because I've wanted soft foods that are easier to eat. The first one was 3 weeks ago when I had to have an abscessed tooth removed, not easy to eat chicken or veggies when there's a space in your mouth that's healing. Then this weekend I got a sinus infection and my throat hurt, so I just wanted cold soft things. Yesterday morning I made the right choice by making a metabolic shake, but the rest of the day was down hill for choices.
So pray for me that I'll get back on track, stay on track and finish up this goal that Jerry and the kids want to see me succeed at, along with me. I feel so good where I'm at and just think I'll feel even better when I'm done. The other change I've made is that I've started working part time at Metabolic. It's a lot of fun and I love working with the ladies that have helped me on my weight loss journey. I thought this would help me get back on track and stay on track, but somehow that hasn't motivated me either. I will get there!! I believe that with God's help and everyone praying for my success, I will get the rest of this weight off and keep it off.
I'm posting a pic to show how good I'm looking so far, but know I'll be looking so much better when I'm done!!
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